The "rough patch" in our friendships
Are you having trouble in a friendship? When we look at relationships we usually look into our romantic relationships. Is the person good for me? Is our relationship going well? And so on, that we even search for signs about continuing the relationship or not. Why don't we do this for our platonic friendships/relationships? Just like in our romantic relationships, we go through rough patches and expect to handle or fix them somehow. We should do the same toward any other relationships we have. They say friends come and go, and the ones that stay are here to stay. That can always change. The rough patches in our friendships suck. Often we do not know what to do. And that’s okay too. As we change our friends change as well. We should embrace the changes in our friendships. The silence in our friendship can actually be healthy. It will give us the time to make the right decision. Silence can bring peace and calm to your mind to say the right thing. Have you ever been in a fight with someone and said something you did not mean to say? I’m sure we all have. The first step is to always take a deep breath and then ask yourself what do I need right now? This will save your energy and your sense of word choice. In friendships, there will always be some type of fight or argument that has to happen. And it is ok for friends to fight. What is not healthy is the constant fighting and constant feeling of exhaustion and the feeling of mistreatment. Now I turn it over to you to analyze yourself and your relationships. I came up with some journal prompts to help you on your “rough patch” with your friends. Allow yourself to open your mind during these journal prompts so that you can find your truth and peace. Feel free to think, write, meditate, or add more questions.
Is this person good for me?
How do I feel after I hang out with this person?
What bugs/irritates me about this person?
What do I like/dislike about this person?
How do I feel meeting/seeing this person?
Imagine life without this person. How does it feel?
Do I like this person? Does this person like me?
If I could change anything about this person, I would change……
What would I not change?
How can I improve our friendship?
Is there anything that this person can do to improve our friendship?
What do I enjoy about our friendship? What do I not enjoy?
When I think of this person I think….
What is the current state of our friendships?
What is the balance between good memories and bad memories?
Do I feel comfortable speaking and sharing my truth? Am I comfortable with this person?
Are there boundaries in our friendship?
Reflect. Looking at all I wrote down, what do I need to do? Rekindle? Stay, wait, or end the friendship?